Speaker: 0:04

Welcome to her time to Talk. I'm Megan Clark, a licensed professional counselor and the founder of Her Time Therapy, a group practice dedicated to supporting women's mental health. This podcast is for women by women, and is all about creating a safe place for our experiences, amplifying our voices, and empowering each other with the knowledge to improve our mental health.

Meagan: 0:28

welcome Melanie to the Her Time to Talk podcast. I'm so excited to have you here with us today. So Melanie, I know you're a huge Taylor Swift fan and I love how you connect to her albums including this last one, the Life of a Showgirl. you often connect it to your work as a mental health therapist and The clients you serve, which are primarily women on their healing journey. before we dive into talking about all of that, I was hoping you could tell me a little bit more about yourself as a clinician and what drew you to this work as a therapist.

Melanie: 0:57

Yeah, so I would be what people consider the eclectic therapist because I often choose interventions from multiple evidence-based modalities, such as C-B-T-D-B-T-A-C-T, people will always hear me say that one size doesn't fit all. So that's where that eclectic. Piece, piece of my work comes in. it's just like wanting to make it a unique experience for each client. I knew from a young age that I wanted to end up in a helping field. fun fact about me is that I originally pursued medicine, but I had an epiphany during my gap year. Post undergrad, that being a physician would not provide the life that I dreamed of. And after I think it was a year or two of soul searching and self-discovery, I realized that being a therapist was a way to reach my end goal of living a balanced and fulfilled life of helping others while also. Being able to pour into myself. And with that being said, my main focus as a clinician is helping clients build their confidence and getting them to find what fulfills them and helps them reach their version of balance.

Meagan: 2:06

Yeah, that definitely sounds like you're really living your calling and doing something you're really passionate about. And because I have the privilege of knowing you behind the scenes, and you're a therapist at her time therapy with me. I know that this was also not your first career and you had a little bit of a career transition too. Can you speak a little bit to that?

Melanie: 2:25

Yeah, so after college, I jumped into working at a community health center. I was at front desk and part of my gap year studying for the mcat. I had an epiphany While studying and definitely after taking it that this is just not for me, and that's okay. I had a huge identity crisis because I tied this career so close with who I was, and. That was a shock to the system to be like, wow, I've been working for four years, basically five towards the stream of becoming a physician and realizing this isn't actually what I want. And it was a very vulnerable time for me. It was very scary because it's like, well, what do I do now? And I can relate to a lot of women who are in these career transitions of like, wow, this is something that I worked really hard towards or dedicated a big chunk of time to, and now I'm not feeling it anymore. And what I would say to that is it's okay. we're human. Our thoughts and feelings are going to evolve over time. What we're interested in is going to evolve over time. Really when it comes to my journey as well, it was, what next, what do I do next? For me that was, starting the self-exploration journey. What am I good at? What is still a helping field that would be sustainable for the lifestyle I want? What could provide me with balance? And not saying that you can't find that as a physician, but for me personally, I just know that it would've been a lot harder to do so, and that's how I ended up being a mental health counselor. Figuring out what my strengths were, what were my end goals, and how can I find a career that would allow me to be fulfilled while still. Have that healthy work life balance.

Meagan: 4:14

That takes a lot of bravery for you, especially as a younger woman too. You put years of work into one career path that you feel personally tied to. You're starting to build an identity around it and then have to take stock of how you're actually feeling in that journey, and deciding. this is not giving me the type of lifestyle that I want, I'm not feeling balanced, it's not good for me maybe. allowing yourself to pivot and change careers, that's a really big shock to your identity, to your nervous system. And I feel like a lot of women come to us with mental health symptoms from, anxiety and depression to burnout They may realize oh man, I'm deep in this pathway that is really not right for me. And the concept of taking that self-assessment to even outwardly acknowledge the fact that, yeah, this is not for me, and look at the pathway of what it would take to change, it just seems too daunting. So I'm wondering what you would say to women that are almost avoidance of the fact that I can't possibly acknowledge this because then my whole identity goes away.

Melanie: 5:19

I've been there and I realized that I had avoided it for a while. I actually think I knew since my senior year of college that maybe being a physician wasn't. My calling and I was in such denial because I had put so much weight on being a physician as part of my identity of like I'm gonna go to med school, I'm gonna change the system, if you will.'cause I have very high ambitions. But to that, I would say it is scary. And I know a lot of times when we are feeling avoidant, it's really just a matter of us, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable with ourselves first and foremost, and sitting down as uncomfortable as it can feel to be like, is this truly what I want out of my life? Doing a self inventory, something that I even work on with clients at times and with myself, quite frankly, Every year is kind of like the wheelhouse of life, am I putting a lot of effort and work, but maybe not my family? Am I not as active as I would like to be? Maybe I'm being more sedentary than I would want to. So even with something like that, just being able to take that self-inventory of what is it that I want out of life? Am I aligning with those wants? What do I value? I aligning with those values and maybe some of my symptoms stemming from that, distance between what I want and where I'm currently at.

Meagan: 6:45

Yeah, that's such a good practice. for our listeners that are not in the field, I wanna point out that some of the things Melanie's talking about here is doing a self-assessment and identifying what your values are, and then making sure that the way that you're living your life, the way that you're spending your time is in alignment And there's actually a lot of tools that can help with this. A therapist can give these to you and walk through it with you, but we can also link to the show notes. Some values based assessments to get you started. And we can also include the self-care wheel that talks about these different domains of life, like family self-care and work, so that you can take an assessment and say, these three categories of life I've really put a lot of time and energy into, but I'm totally ignoring this other one and I didn't even realize it. Yeah. So to shift us back to Taylor Swift, because that's the fun thing we're here to talk about today. I wanna draw this parallel between what we've been talking about in terms of career shift and identity to Taylor Swift's albums and the kind of attention she gets for the different themes of each album. they're all very different and she's clearly an artist and a writer. Works a lot of intentional messaging into her work. We as women developed this identity that is tied to this presentation of ourselves that we have built and constructed for the world. Sometimes we call this a mask that we wear when we go out into the world and function as who we are. it's often tied to what society expects us to be. We're taught what is okay to show up as and what is not acceptable to show up as. I think it's really interesting the way that Taylor navigates. This from album to album because in this life of a showgirl album, she is leaning into her life as a showgirl and is, leaning into the fun and more poppy elements of that. But she's had other albums that are much more raw and painful and leans into the difficult spaces. So I'm curious to hear your take on her latest album and what you think about it and some of the more immediate response that she's been getting.

Melanie: 8:50

Personally, I love the new album. the reason being, and I know it's heavily biased, is just that, I think I've found ways to create my own happiness amongst the chaos. Whether that's. What's happening in our country, what's happening in the world, and quite frankly, what's even happening in my own personal life and what has happened, that led me here. So when it comes to the backlash, I know a lot of times Swifties can, be on the defense like, oh, you must love her music. Not everyone's gonna jive with her music. even if they love one era, maybe they're not gonna love this era. And maybe it's just because they may not relate to it yet. personally, I did not relate to folklore at first, but then once I stepped into that era of my life, I was like, wow, this music really hits home. I think it's just a matter of letting things roll off our back and acknowledge that not everyone is gonna have the same preferences as us. And we don't have to take that personally. It's not an attack on us as a person. I have seen people bashing swifties or swifties bashing non swifties, or even swifties bashing swifties, it reminds me of what the current social and political climate looks like now, and I'm just wondering if there's a way for us to take a step back and realize that not everything has to be taken personally. if it is exploring that, like what does it mean if someone doesn't like the same album as you can? We look at it from a different perspective.

Meagan: 10:19

absolutely. I think that's so important. to be fair, a lot of people expected Taylor with her status and the stance that she's taken politically in the past to come out strong fight back and show resistance. we expected something to match the level of chaos and intensity happening politically right now. So when she comes out with this album that's very like, fun and romantic and poppy, it seems like that juxtaposition between this kind of fluffy high versus the absolute destruction and chaos that we're seeing in our country right now, Almost like staring into the sunlight, right? it's too far of a contrast to be comfortable with.

Speaker 3: 11:00

Mm-hmm.

Meagan: 11:00

I'm wondering if in some ways that is her point here is that she is gonna stay above being dragged into the chaos of it and being forced to respond and leaning into something more positive and more fun and allowing herself to be in that era of her life right now and put art. Out that matches. It is actually a form of resistance in itself. Right now, anything that we can do to lean into the things that bring us joy and talk about the good things happening in our life is actually a form of resistance too.

Melanie: 11:35

I love the way you worded that. No, I've definitely been thinking about this because it, does feel so out of place with what's happening and how. This administration is impacting us. I was doing a lot of deep reflection even back in 2008, I know I was still a child, for me personally, my parents were like, oh my gosh, the economy's crashing yet. The mainstream music was still like a clubbing vibe, it was fun upbeat and kind of. Out of place as well. I often think that we deserve to take a break from the craziness and heaviness of life. while we can all acknowledge that being able to take a break is a privilege, I remind myself and my clients that sometimes we do just need that break if we have access to it. we need to find those small pockets of air to reinvigorate ourselves. To continue fighting the good fight, whether that's finding balance in our personal lives or getting out in the streets to protest, be a voice for the voiceless and voting. Our world will inevitably have chaos and there will always be some sort of conflict happening the music. put out, may not always match that. And that's okay. Maybe that's our way to take a little break from the chaos and breathe back life into ourselves so we can continue pushing forward.

Meagan: 12:54

That's really well said and it's a good reminder that we have to allow ourselves space to take breaks. you made a good point about how being able to take a break is a privilege. So we wanna honor that and also put it out there that we expect, everyone to the degree they're capable of, but especially someone with the status and power of Taylor Swift to use all of that power and privilege in a way that is gonna do good in the world and help, resist a lot of what's happening right now. And she is, she's been very open about her political stances. She's donated money to certain, charities and different things that help resist against what's happening. she is active, but she's not active a hundred percent of the time in that direction, and that's because. She's an entertainer. She's not an activist. She doesn't have to do all of one thing that society expects her to. And as a woman on top that doesn't lean into doing what people are telling her to do all the time and what she's expected to do that is still modeling that kind of resistance. And as mental health therapists, I think, it's really important for us to make that point We can. Do really important activism type work. And that into our daily life and our weekly routines even, but it absolutely cannot be a hundred percent of the time. if so, we're gonna be absolutely flooded and burn out so quickly that we're not gonna be effective in the long term. And with what we're seeing politically right now, this is absolutely a marathon. It's not a sprint. So that ability to take a break to find joy in something. It's not you tapping out and saying that you don't care anymore. It's you saying, okay, I'm gonna step back so someone else can step in and then I'm gonna come back when I have recharged and have brought some regulation back to my nervous system. Yeah. So leaning into this theme of Taylor's you've drawn a parallel between this life of a showgirl concept and the life of a healing girl because you help other women heal along their journey. I'm really curious to see how you connect some of Taylor Swift's work and maybe the lyrics in her song to the mental health journeys that you help women with.

Melanie: 15:04

taylor Swift has been able to capture what it's like to. Be a woman, a young girl, a teenager, back in 2006 when she first debuted, I was around 11 or 12, and experiencing heartache from a boy I had a crush on. And her music started there for me in that journey. Even up to now, like being late twenties, early thirties experiencing everything life throws our way, loved ones, getting sick, loved ones, passing away adult relationships, beginning, ending, questioning our purpose in life, and now even finding ways to make our own sunshine amidst the chaos The way that I see Taylor's discography connecting to the mental health journey of women, whether that was my journey or clients currently, is that we all have our own timelines, our own paths and our life stories. one common denominator is emotions. Whether that's feeling so deeply, that sometimes we want to avoid those emotions. Or on the flip side, feeling so deeply that we may even have difficulties regulating ourselves. I've been there, I've done that. I think that is the beauty of it though, is that universally, as humans, we have the capacity to fill these emotions, whether they're pleasant and unpleasant, and. Her discography highlights the ups and downs, the ebbs and flows of life. out of this album, the Life of a Showgirl, Opal Light. It really just hit on the theme of being able to dance through the darkness, through the lightning strikes of life. metaphorically that could be, losing someone, whether through death or disconnection. It's a lightning strike in our lives, and as we continue to work on ourselves to build skills to increase emotional regulation. Or even change the way that we perceive things. We can make our own skies al light through the sunshine that we can create for ourselves.

Meagan: 16:57

That is beautifully said and I especially love your point about emotion being the common denominator. That is truly the thing. None of us can escape even if we wanted to. and I hope people do lean into it because it is so powerful to truly be in touch with your own emotions and lean into them because they tell us so much. we're a little biased'cause this is the space we work in. It's so true that for therapists right now, it's a tough time and we see a lot of fear and harm coming from the world right now no matter what is going on, even if it's a quote unquote good political atmosphere, if such a thing can exist, people are always going to go through moments of grief and hardship. And there are inevitably gonna be tough things that happen in life and bring negative emotions, but there's always something. Beautiful in that if you allow yourself to see it and to feel it. sometimes that requires you to go through the most negative, scary, darkest emotions before those can settle enough for you to see the light. Exactly.

Melanie: 17:59

I love the way you worded that I could see it in my brain happening.

Meagan: 18:03

And I think that's what music like Taylor's is meant to evoke and to remind people of. To put a tangible example to that, that was the way her time therapy practice got founded. I don't think this business and this wonderful group of women like you that I get to work with without my mom having been diagnosed with cancer and going through this horrific journey Having to lose this central person in my life and go through the grieving process is something that I would never choose to go through I really hope a lot of people don't have to and that we one day get the medical care we need that it is not as common as it is, but it's because of that journey that I got to a place through going. Into the depth of my grief and into all the really deep core of sadness there that I could see, what really matters now? What can we actually pull from this? What we're talking about here is what this. means to be in your healing era. Or living this life of a healing girl.'cause I don't know if it's just one encapsulated era. Oh, I went to therapy for a year, that was my healing era and I'm done. Right? that's not really how it works. We always have more work we can do and more areas to heal. there's a lot of depth to us as human beings and as women in particular. So let's unpack that a little bit and name what does this mean and what does it look like to be living the life of a healing girl and leaning into that self improvement.

Melanie: 19:28

The way that I view it, living the life of a healing girl means moving from performance to presence. It's no longer about curating an image of having it all together it's, about learning to sit with yourself, your emotions and your truth. And while the showgirl strive for perfection and validation, the healing girl practices self-compassion, learns to set boundaries, maintain those boundaries and honors her own pace in life and healing. In my point of view becomes an active rebellion against perfectionism and posed on us by socialization and is a return to self-trust and inner peace.

Meagan: 20:13

Yeah, and I think that trust is such a big part too, the relationship with ourselves and the trust that we can set boundaries with our own self and respect them and honor them is foundational to that healing journey. a lot of my clients. Come in and they have this vision of what life could be, but they're paralyzed because of what it would take, what this person would think about it, what if they fail? at the end of the day, one of the big things that helps break through all of that is doing just the next step that will help you trust yourself a little bit more.

Speaker 3: 20:47

So

Meagan: 20:48

that you can build up that confidence too. Maybe even find a better balance between both being in that showgirl moment and that healing girl moment. Yeah, because I don't think it has to be all one or the other.'cause we do have to go out into the world and present ourselves. We go to work, we present at conferences, we do all kinds of really important things where we have to show up a certain way and that's great. We also have to give ourselves that space to come into that healing and regenerative space where we get to feel the overwhelm allow the adrenaline to come down and notice the way we're talking to ourselves so that we can reregulate and then come back into that showgirl platform even better.

Melanie: 21:31

that's a great. Way to put things having the privilege of being able to have time to rest. Maybe that is our time to find balance between the self-compassion and going back on stage to give more. Of ourselves, there's a sweet spot between the two one woman's balance may not look the same in another woman's life

Meagan: 21:50

absolutely. I've seen on social media, especially a big push right now of women being urged into this, trad wife. Persona hustle culture and boss babe culture has been so heavy and overwhelming that women are like I want it all, but it's so exhausting. So I'm just gonna maybe go into my softer era or this era where I am taken care of a little bit. I'm curious about your perspective on the balance here. can women have it all? and what do you make of this? Exhaustion forcing them into the soft era. You know, it's so

Melanie: 22:26

funny you bring this up because it's something that I've really grappled with. Being freshly engaged, this is not something I ever truly envisioned happening in my life, whether that's from trauma and other past relational things that have happened. It's really made me wonder, what is it to be a feminist, does me getting married and potentially having a family one day negate the fact that I'm a feminist and want women to make choices for themselves? I know even with, the song Wishlist on Taylor's new album, I've heard some critiques about it saying that the chorus is really focusing on tread wife propaganda because she states that she wants to get married, have kids that look like Travis. it makes me wonder, like, okay, like would me wanting these things make me. Wife, like, would that put me in that pipeline? But life is so nuanced, right? We live in the gray area, and I think a lot of times we're looking at life is black and white. You're either a tread wife or you're either a hardcore feminist. But what if we allow women to choose what they want? If women want to be in their softer era. But still have beliefs of a feminist and protest as they see fit, whether that's out in the streets or online, through reading and writing. Why wouldn't we allow them to do that, If someone wants to enter their soft woman era and be taken care of, is that such a bad thing? Could we allow ourselves to be taken care of so we can also pour into others? So there's just so many nuances, and I think it's a matter of us living in the gray area and not trying to impose our own beliefs of what a feminist is or what a trad wife is down other people's throats. what if we could have it all? And when I say could we have it all, that doesn't mean that we have to have everything perfect. Like all of our ducks don't have to be lined up in a row. we don't have to be the housewife. But if someone wants to be a housewife.

Meagan: 24:33

I think what you're speaking into is not forcing women into a box.

Melanie: 24:38

Yeah.

Meagan: 24:39

Your description here is actually the most accurate definition of what feminism actually is. this is where it gets a really kind of negative wrap like, oh, feminists are just the harsh women that are out there protesting on the streets and that wanna be CEOs and not get married and not have a family. And there's this like very extremist view of feminist being put out there when actually Fundamentally at the core feminism is simply choice. It just comes down to choice. if you choose to be a stay at home mom and a housewife, and that is what brings you the most joy, that is beautiful. And absolutely an act of feminism. If you want to be the CEO of a company. Not get married and not have kids. That's feminism too. And hey, the mix of both where maybe you do have your own career, but you also have a family that you love. Feminism means that women don't have to pick, they can have it all because we encourage systems and support to be built around that possibility. That is what real feminism is. It's not. this sort of woman or that sort of woman. women get to choose and not be, talked badly about for either having ambition or for having this softer era that they are choosing for themselves. Exactly.

Melanie: 25:54

Yeah, and like I said, that was something that I was really grappling with myself too. Just being like, oh wow, I'm in this relationship and it's healthy. But what does that say about me? Do other people perceive me in a different light now because I may be falling into a trajectory that maybe more of a radical feminist view would deem, incorrect, if you will, but that just feels so. In validating of my own experience. And I'm sure a lot of women feel the same way there's so many different areas that we can step into and it's our choice and that's okay.

Meagan: 26:28

Yeah, absolutely. And you having a healthy relationship and a career and the ambition to do all these other things That is you living a feminist life. So it's also that matter of allowing your identity to be a little bit fluid and to allow different things to come in at different parts of your life. It doesn't mean you are or you aren't something. And that still ties into Taylor's work and how different one album is to the other. She's a good model of, I'm allowing myself to lean into this thing right now, and I'm gonna allow myself to grow and not stay stagnant in this one. Box either.

Melanie: 27:05

That's so true. Especially'cause she started off with country and then slowly transitioned into pop and then, went into more indie music and now we're back to pop. So it totally makes sense. in my planner, I have a quote of the week and it's just so fitting that we're talking about this, my current quote of the week is, I am my ancestors' wildest dream. My own greatest investment even with my grandma, she grew up in such a different time, so did my mom, but especially my grandma, she's even told me wow, it's so amazing to see you go out, drive, have your own bank account. Have your own credit cards, go to school and get educated, continue going into education. being able to have your own apartment. it's just so many things that we take for granted because of the backbones of our grandparents and our parents even to get us the rights that we have now.

Meagan: 28:00

I love that quote so much. I'm really glad you shared that and that you're making this point, because that goes back to speaking about this perception of feminism right now too, it's a really important reminder for women out there and anyone listening that if you're a woman who enjoys having your own bank account. being able to buy a house and have a mortgage in your name. To legally have protection to keep your job if you choose to become pregnant and have a family. If you enjoy all those things, you are benefiting from feminist ideals and you are likely a feminist surprise.

Melanie: 28:33

Yeah. I know a lot of times feminist does have a bad connotation. But even just reflecting on my introduction to feminism was I think 10th or 11th grade. I always knew that there was an imbalance of power structure, but didn't have a name for it. one of my good friends that I grew up with. She presented on the wage gap and it was during our, Our honors English class and I was just like, wait. So there are words for this? These are very real problems that people just try to shove under the rug. But even I can feel it as a high schooler, this imbalance and see it in the world. It's just allowing yourself to be exposed to different viewpoints and See the truth in the matter of the patriarchy, if you will.

Meagan: 29:20

I think this is a big reason why people are so quick to judge Taylor Swift and have really harsh criticism for anything she puts out, or the level of her tours and whether or not she is a participant in capitalism and perpetuates that Let's take a minute and remember that women only had the ability to have this kind of success for like one generation, my mom graduated high school before it was legal for women to even apply for a business loan or have bank accounts in their own name. for her to have a business and for me to see that as a child is a key thing That kind of gave me the confidence to open my own practice and run it. But I'm Just the first generation that was born in an era where that was even possible and legal.

Speaker 3: 30:06

So

Meagan: 30:07

we are seeing that in our families and neighborhoods more and more women are getting educated at a rapid rate owning businesses and doing incredible things. and Taylor Swift at the level of, success she's been able to reach because of her skill hard work and intention around all of this. It feels very disconcerting. a society where this is the first time it's happened. Really. And

Melanie: 30:30

thinking about Taylor Swift, I also think about other successful women artists such as Beyonce and the intersectionality that comes with that This really is the first time that women have this level of, I don't wanna say equality, but power. It may not be the same level as men quite yet, but we're definitely inching there. I would like to stay on the hopeful side of things. it really is a new territory for all of us to explore and maybe even checking, internalized misogyny as well when it comes to criticizing women in the spotlight is this truly a criticism or is it potentially coming from a place Of internalized misogyny that we may not even be fully aware of.

Meagan: 31:11

that's a really important point, and I definitely wanna do a whole episode on internalized misogyny. That's such a thing. a great example that I've seen come out across Instagram within the last day or two, is people criticizing the number of albums being sold across different platforms. like a pink version and the different colors of her record. it's so what, she's being a really smart business woman and is capitalizing on the work that she's done and making a profit off of it because her time and her skill and her energy is valuable. So she is being really smart about how do we make a profit from it? And I don't see any male artist being criticized for like, gosh, why did you put your album out in so many different formats?

Melanie: 31:52

It reminds me of the song, the Man by Taylor Swift, if she was a man, she'd be the man because she's really feeding into the demand that the fans are asking for. And what is wrong about that? I know that there's a lot of debates that we could probably go into with others of the capitalistic nature of it, but at the same time, like you said, she's being a great business woman at the end of the day, and if we have issues with capitalism as a whole, we don't always have to just focus on female artists. There's so many other CEOs out there that are not even donating. it's examining who am I criticizing? Why am I criticizing them? What is the root issue and how can we expand that to men as well?

Meagan: 32:38

It's that somatic awareness of if I'm feeling put off by this powerful woman doing this thing. How does it feel? Where do you feel in your body and where is that coming from? What is really behind it? And even that moment of reflection can help you check yourself and check that internalized misogyny, that is unfortunately there for all of us because we are. Born and raised in a patriarchy. that's part of the bigger work of redirecting what's happening right now. to bring this back to mental health and our therapy work, I'm wondering how some of these concepts come up for you in your work with clients. Do you see some of your women wanting to follow their ambition but being held back because of how it's gonna be perceived? Or what do you think gets in the way for women?

Melanie: 33:22

Yeah. oftentimes whether it's myself, my friends, or my clients, women have difficulties identifying and establishing healthy boundaries. We're raised to Put others first, right? But what about ourselves? I often hear undertones of the following thoughts, do I deserve happiness? What is happiness? Is happiness, what my parents or caregivers want from me? What my friends or partners want from me? And will people dislike me if I start to say no And forge my own life and happiness. I think that's where we get to come in as therapists, to help challenge those thoughts and beliefs, provide skills to become more assertive and feel empowered to establish and maintain healthy boundaries that can become a foundation for the healing journey.

Meagan: 34:13

Yeah, that's so well said. And I love that question you just said there about, Will people start to dislike me or not be okay with me? If I start saying no and holding boundaries from my style as a therapist, I'm gonna say, absolutely yes. They may stop inviting you to things. They may cause conflict because. Ironically, that can actually be a sign that you're doing it, right? You're setting and holding boundaries. Well, when people are not super happy with you, the people that benefit from you not holding boundaries and not taking care of yourself, are not gonna be happy when that switches. It doesn't mean that's not really important for you and your overall ability to care for yourself as well as others. Exactly. thank you so much for being here today, Melanie. I love how we're able to look at the great work that someone like Taylor Swift is doing and her art that is put out there as a method of talking about all these concepts of career and ambition and what's holding women back. For anyone that is looking to work with you and is really wanting to start their Healing Girl journey and wants to be in the life of a healing girl, how do they get in touch with you to work with you?

Melanie: 35:19

you can always reach out by going to her time therapy.com or reaching out via email to info@hertimetherapy.com. A couple of things I do just wanna leave you all with is. The worst thing that can happen is you try therapy, whether it's with me or another therapist, and maybe you just don't vibe know that you have the ability to change your mind at any point in time. I know I can only speak for myself, but I would like to over generalize and say most therapists are. To help heal you. if you are not making that connection with us, we won't take it personally. we'll connect you with others that you know, you may be able to vibe more with and finding that right fit for you. One last thing to any women or listeners out there, my advice would be, you don't have to have it all figured out to start showing up for yourself. the version of you that feels overwhelmed still deserves care. We can start small. Whether that's, learning to set one boundary that's healthy, having one honest conversation with either ourselves or someone close to us, or even just taking one deep breath at a time. You don't have to rush your healing process. You just have to keep choosing it, even if it feels messy. That's where the transformation and healing begins.

Meagan: 36:41

That's really well said. And I wanna highlight too, therapy doesn't have to be scary. It can be fun and your sessions can include a lot of laughter even if you would like to come in and have a session with Melanie to talk about the new Taylor Swift album and what song made you feel, what emotion and how it plays a part in your particular healing journey. That is a valid topic for a therapy session and one that is a really great launching point for your healing journey. So if you're ready to start that, please do reach out thank you again Melanie. We really appreciate your insight and all the great work you do.

37:14

If you're feeling empowered by today's episode, be sure to subscribe and leave us a review. You can also follow us on social media at her time to talk for more updates and tips. And if you'd like to support the show, consider becoming a patron. If you're ready to take the next step in your mental health journey, visit her time therapy.com and schedule a free consultation with one of our therapists. Thank you for taking the time to talk today. Remember, your story matters. Your voice is powerful, and your mental health is worth prioritizing. Until next time, take care of yourself. This is your time. The information shared on this podcast is not intended to be personal mental health advice, and listening to this podcast does not create a therapeutic relationship between the listener and the therapist featured on this podcast. We encourage listeners to engage with a licensed therapist for personalized mental health treatment and advice.